This Year

There is both excitement and nervousness when I think about the start of this new year. I can officially say that I am having bottom surgery THIS year. That feels pretty damn good and crazy to say.

It is all becoming more real. Half of the hair on my arm is now gone, and I feel myself getting slightly self consiouce about it. I guess it is a little peek inside what it might feel like when I have a large arm scar.

Some days thinking about the scar doesn’t bother me… but then other days it comes back full force. On the days that it comes back full force I think about the cool tattoo I want to get… on days I don’t care, I wonder if I will even bother to tattoo over it. I guess we will see.

2016 was a very strange year. I had a lot of ups and downs. Friends were getting married, having babies, and moving on with their life and I struggled to feel needed or like I had a place in their lives still. I am still struggling with this but I am hoping that this year will bring me a new place in life, that I won’t get caught up in what others are doing and focus on what I want to accomplish for myself and not what I think is expected of me.

2017 is the year of the penis! A year of taking action, realizing I have the power to get where I want and striving to better myself.

Something happened when I stepped on stage last year and competed in bodybuilding. I did something that others probably didn’t think I would ever do, and I fought my hardest against the fears that even I thought would prevent me from stepping on that stage. It showed me that I am a fighter, and I WILL fight against whatever is thrown at me. I will never give up. Bring it on 2017.