Tomorrow is my consultation for bottom sugery. This is actually my second consult but it is with a new doctor. My first consult was with Dr. Crane but this consult is with one of his partners Dr. Chen. At first I couldn’t imagine having bottom surgery with anyone who was new but I have heard lots of good things about Dr. Chen and he has not had any major complications as of yet.
I am still trying to decide between Meta or Phallo. I am hoping tomorrow’s appointment will help make it more clear about which procedure is right for me. It bums me out to think that with either surgery… you are sacrificing something.
The other day I was almost sure I was going to go with Meta, but then I saw some pictures of the arm scar a year post-op and thought.. hmm thats actually not bad.. and the mind battle between the two surgeries continued.
It is also strange to think that I will be having this consult only a few days before my two year top surgery anniversary.
I used to also let the idea of phallo stop me because I work in a kitchen and I use my right arm so much. My job is pretty physical so I am not just sitting at a desk all day… but I am looking for something new at this point. Maybe I will have surgery and move onto something new if opportunity allows. It is all unclear.
I am trying to focus on what is most important to me.. and right now the ability to pee standing up (using a urinal )is what I put high on the priority list because public restrooms give me a lot of anxiety. I feel like it limits me socially sometimes.. so to get rid of that anxiety would be awesome.
Hoping to get some clarification tomorrow.